“Since when did food need to be ‘fortified’? I mean, seriously, do you erect battlements around your granola? There’s some kind of bizarre WWII thing going on here.

Of course, walnuts come with their own built-in fortifications. But why would we want to militarize the juice of oranges or bread? I guess this idea comes from having done something ridiculous first. Like pretending we could grow food in soil devastated by factory-farming and ‘fertilizers’.

The resulting ‘produce’ isn’t food at all; it simply shares the same traditional appearance of food. But it’s not only missing nutritional components; the food was deprived of life while it was growing or maturing.

So I guess that ‘dead food’ needs a fort around it or something to make up for what was pre-stolen.

Someone must have imagined breakfast cereal with a flotilla of battleships appearing through the milk. Little nuclear submarines and shit. Who the fuck thought this up?

Armadas of toylike idiocy rampaging across the dinner table, erecting flags and exchanging artillery fire.

Which, when I think about it, reminds me of damn near every stupid thing about the modern world.”

— Bobby Yingo at the Breakfast Table.