Although I do not entirely agree*, this is an interesting perspective:

“One of the great paradoxes of romantic love is that it »never produces human relationship as long as it stays romantic». It produces drama, daring adventures, wondrous, intense love scenes, jealousies, and betrayals; but people never seem to settle into relationship with each other as flesh-and-blood human beings until they are out of the romantic love stage, until they »love each other instead of being ‘in love.'”

— Robert A. Johnson, We

* I find this author’s work interesting and useful, however much can be gained from tearing it apart as well as taking it in.