“You have a position on recent events that have … largely or effectively nothing whatsoever to do with you, or even anyone you’ve ever known… and want to aggressively broadcast that on social media?

Don’t be like me and just start running that aspect of your mind that fails to generate successful comedy.

Stop. Imagine cartoons. Go absurd. Then direct the results back upon their origins in your mind.

Because any ordinary ferret made out of a pickle claiming dominion over cat videos is literally better for the world than my disoriented and actively psy-op’d opinions about today’s primary news item.

That said, think about what happens when a turgid, bi-leptic nematode falls in love with page 73 of War and Peace, and manages to actually acquire its ardor, in return.”

— love isn’t always unrequited