“I heard a weird sound on the deck that leads to my front door, and since I don’t have any windows in the front, I opened the door to check it out.

I turned the porch light on because it was so dark, and at first I didn’t see anything, but as my eyes adjusted after blinking and squinting I realized I was confronted with many, many rhesus macaque monkeys who looked both tired AND weary. It seems silly, and I admit I was a little taken aback as it was somewhat unusual for a Friday night in Oella, but I managed to use all my remaining strength similar to how one struggles to make a definitive statement in a dream, and quietly asked “Can I help you with something?”

Not all quite simultaneously each monkey put out their left hands to show me their stashes of stink bugs. I nodded and said “Cool.” Then they all put out their right hands which were crawling with spotted lantern flies. That time I just nodded and blinked a lot.

Then who I can only assume was their leader, who appeared to be the most powerful female of the most powerful matriline, stepped forward and asked me “Do you have a moment to chat about Angela Alsobrooks?”

I slowly shook my head with sadness in my eyes as well as in my heart, and carefully backed into the house and closed my door. And turned off the porch light.

Since I still had a few moments before heading to bed, I went ahead and posted this on the Nextdoor app, which I will share here in it’s entirety:

“I am confiding this manuscript to space, not with the intention of saving myself, but to help, perhaps, to avert the appalling scourge that is menacing the human race. Lord have pity on us!””

— infraheard (JM)