“By defecting from himself, and embarking on self-destruction, he was overtly defecting from the group-family, all the while pretending to be doing something else.

He didn’t enjoy being shown this. In fact, it enraged him.

He envisioned self-destruction as noble, and had a narrative that one day he ‘would just drop dead’.

So they questioned him: that’s your plan? What if you just drop half-dead? This is how you see your role in the family? You’ll take care of it by dropping dead? The insurance money?”

— infraheard