“So, the other day, Life made the signal that we were gonna’ dance.

We’ve been here before.

I calmly got out my Flora Danica teacup, pre-loaded with fresh Captain Crunch, poured some -organic- chocolate milk on that sh*t, raised a salute in Life’s general direction — and downed it.

As Life gazed at me in awe, I aggressively chewed that cereal -in my throat passage-. I gotta’ admit, the effect was startling, even to me. In any case, that was the end of the matter. Life’s face squinched up into a rotten cabbage-like affair and she fled, mewling.

It goes without saying that I am going to have to up the ante in future transactions.”

— an anonymous (pu)[mo]nk