by orchaeus | May 6, 2024 | Status Update
“I love driving my cats batshit insane with little toys attached to string or whatever. They totally go nuts. I laugh until I’m drooling. Then, later, I think: Wait a minute, this is what giant invisible space octopuses are doing to us with that shit we...
by orchaeus | May 5, 2024 | Status Update
It is the day of 5 Mayonaises. Be sure to get some.
by orchaeus | May 5, 2024 | Status Update
I generally feel that we should give people we’re close to or care about … far more benefit of the doubt … what’s referred to as leeway … than we might otherwise be inclined to under other circumstances. This is a crucial aspect of...
by orchaeus | May 5, 2024 | Status Update
“Of course, the actual problem is the same thing that’s been going on your entire life: you’re 19 kinds of original awesome in a small package, and this causes catastrophic confusion, wrath, lust, terror, and sudden public defecation anomalies...
by orchaeus | May 5, 2024 | Status Update
“One day I received a letter. It was addressed to Shattered Mirror. No actual address. No stamp. No postmark. I thought to myself: “This is the most accurately addressed letter in human history!” Because this is what it’s like to be born. To...
by orchaeus | May 4, 2024 | Status Update
Some idiot with road rage: “I will make your life a living hell!” Me: “Thanks for the upgrade!”
